At times parents feel frustrated by their children’s behaviour and do not know what to do. All children need guidance to help them learn self-control.
Positive guidance, or ‘discipline’, teaches children skills, raises their self-esteem, and strengthens the parent-child bond. Physical punishment is not positive discipline. Children need safe, stable and nurturing relationships with their parents.
Spanking is not an effective way to change your child’s behaviour. Spanking can harm your relationship with your child. Research shows that spanking teaches your child to solve problems with aggression.
Tips to Guide Your Child’s Behaviour in a Positive Way
#1 Calm down before you act.
When we get frustrated, we can react without thinking. If you react in ways that are hurtful, you can make the situation worse by scaring your child. Try to breathe deeply when you feel yourself getting frustrated. Wait until your body relaxes and you can think clearly before doing or saying anything.
#2 Think about what you want your child to learn in this moment.
Your child will learn how to deal with frustration by watching how you deal with it. Children who are spanked are more likely to solve their own conflicts by hitting others. To teach children how to be respectful and non-violent, you need to treat them with respect and interact without violence. Show them how it is done.
#3 Consider your child’s point of view.
Most of the behaviours that frustrate parents are normal reactions to hunger, tiredness, boredom, restlessness, fear, illness, pain, discouragement, frustration or stress.
#4 Think about your child’s stage of development.
Babies are just beginning to learn about the world. They need to know that they live in a safe place. They often cry because they do not have words to tell you how they feel or what they need. It can be hard to figure out what they are trying to tell you. Babies never cry to make you mad. They just need to be comforted and protected.
#5 Create a loving and respectful home.
Adults are important role models. Children learn from watching how adults treat each other, as well as how they treat children. Talk with your child and explain things so she can learn. Show him and tell him you appreciate his efforts. Respect her need to grow, learn and explore. Teach him about safety and distract him from things that can harm him. Respect her need for sleep and healthy food, which greatly affect her behaviour. Have a daily routine. Last but not least, have fun with your child!
#6 Do not be afraid to ask for help.